My son wets his bed he has ADHD, sleep disorder very hard to get him to bed he is 13 any one pass experience?

our life is very difficult he became very bad in school though everyone says he is a genius. please I need either professional or people with similar experience reply HELP a whole family who is suffering

Wow! It is hard to understand exactly what the problem is as there seems to be a few separate problems. But I shall do my best to help you.
Just for the record, I have had two 13 year old bed wetters and also have had severe problems getting a teenager to go to bed at night.

Regarding the going to bed at night. Once they get to 13 you can no longer force them to do things or it becomes a power struggle, which you don't want. I ended up offering some alternatives to my teen.

While you cannot force him to "go to bed", you can enforce that he is in his bedroom by a certain time each night. Do yourself a favor and be lenient. Ask him what time he thinks is suitable and try real hard to work with him and get him to agree first. That is important.

Then work with him to create a list of things that he is allowed to do in his room if he refuses to go to sleep, eg: read a book, tidy his room. Try to offer him two or three things that will not disrupt the rest of the household.

I know you might not get him to go to sleep early (you don't have control over that really). So just try to contain and have some input as to how much he interrupts the rest of your family at night time.

Hopefully, he will soon get bored of being in his room with boring things to do and will make his own choice to put himself to sleep.

Now, don't worry about if he stays up too late if he isn't being annoying. My teenager would stay up late every night, then sleep in the next morning. I simply bought him an alarm clock and told him that I would no longer be responsible for him getting up in the morning if he chose to stay up late at night.

Do you see what I am getting at here? Put the responsibility back on your son for his actions.

OK. That's the sleep thing. Now the bed wetting. I understand there can be medical reasons. And then there are "laziness reasons". I can say this because I have been here twice, and have actually still had a 16 year old wet the bed very occasionally.

Firstly, they should be responsible for what they do, without reprimand at all times. If they wet, simply tell them what to do with their clothes. "OK Johnnie, please strip your bed and put your wet stuff in the washing machine for me. When the washing is finished I will tell you so you can hang it out to dry".

If you help him you are enabling him to carry on any portion that might be linked to laziness (even if it is a sub conscious thing due to being a deep sleeper). Don't make any fuss, in fact praise him for fixing things up promptly.

This way you will likely see an improvement very quickly, especially if you don't fuss about it. It's just a cause and consequence. You wet your bed, you clean up a mess".

With regards to the other behaviors, I can but recommend one thing that saved my sanity. The Total Transformation Program (link below). It teaches parents how to react to their children to bring out the best in them.

It is well worth its weight in gold and will give you many hints as how to handle these other situations. They also have a parental support line so you will not be alone in your struggle. I wish you well.

My first question would be is he being seen by a professional? Is he currently on a treatment plan? medication, counseling, etc? If he is on medication, are there any side effects that could be contributing to his bed wetting? Is the bed wetting due to sleeping too soundly and not waking to use the bathroom? Is it anxiety related? Is it a side effect of any medications? How much fluid is he consuming close to bed time? Is he vacating his bladder right before going to bed? Is the difficulty going to bed because he doesn't want to? Is it due to the knowledge that he will wet the bed? Have you tried simple temporary things such as an adult diaper (don't share this information with siblings or any one else who may tease him)? He should be able to put it on privately and remove and dispose of it privately. They should be purchased in regards to his privacy. If the difficulty in going to bed is in falling asleep, you can try a natural supplement found in any department store pharmacy area; Melatonin. This is a supplement to the natural melatonin that our bodies produce; it's what makes you sleepy and allows your body to relax to fall asleep. If he is on other medications you should check with your doctor to be sure he may take it.

Do not put him on meds! I hate to say it but ADHD drugs have terrible effects such as difficulty sleeping i.e. sleep disorders. Prescription drugs are unfortunately the medical industry's answer to every thing. Instead of treating him like an asylum patient treat him as if he's a normal 13 year old, because the more his problems are thrown in his face the more rebellious he's going to become. Work with him emotionally and psychologically. Do things physically with him. Play outside with him, make him feel like your there for him. Don't be a lazy parent and give him pills and trusting that that will do the work for you. It's obviously not helping your situation.

I am hoping that this will help as I am trying to get help for my sons actions in school as well. Although, my son is six years old and a Kindergartener...1) Does your school have a special program that works with your family in helping your son to control his problems? EX: Here in nebraska, we have what is called the SAFE program and an official comes to your home to work with your family on issues regarding behaviorial and as well as helping your family out with a regular schedule....I kind of reminds me of the nanny 911 show though. My son also has a theropist and will be seeing a psychiatrist as well here soon.

Now, information for the parents...what you can do is check out PTI of your state//I think it stands for Parents Training Information. These people are currently setting me up with a free workshop on ADHD, behaviral issues and how to communicate or say the right things. They are all different workshops that I will get to attend in the next months or so. Also, another way to get information is thru the Learning Disabilities Association of your state. The LDA told me for example that the spokeswoman for ADHD moms will be coming to do a one hour session on ADHD at the SAC Museum next Saturday and for those who do not know who she is...her name is Debbie Phelps; yes, she is that gold medalist Olympic USA swimmer, Michael Phelps, mom. It is free to the public but of course there is an admission fee to go in the museum in Ashland, Nebraska.

There are a lot of resources out there and I hope that these two will help you out just the same. My son actually has to be put into a school for behaviorial problem children as it is. He is a very smart boy but just will not want to sit down and do the work in school and plus he is a problem when it comes to safety issues as well. Again, I do hope that everything works out for you in this case.

I have some suggestions that helped my daughter..
NO caffeine , chocolate, tea etc.
NO water after 7pm
Make him go before he goes to bed, even several times

Also, is he on a schedule ?? If he's not, get one started ASAP, and have him do things to prepare him about 2 hours before bed, such as reading or a nice warm bath , and is he getting exercise daily ? If not, you need to get him active.

Is he on any meds for it ?I would get him to a dr if you havn't already.

I don't know if it is true, but I have heard of people with these same problems having been found to have an allergy to milk. Once they stopped eating any dairy, they managed to regain bladder control and behaviors. You might look up food sensitivities for his ADHD, and also Candida for this same thing. He may have a Candida infection.

I was in the same boat as you with my son, and the methods in this article really helped turn him around. Not only is he getting straight A's, but my family now has some peace and quiet, as well as peace of mind.

http://www.hearts-and-kisses.com/attenti...

I suppose you already have a plastic mattress cover?

Limit the boy's beverage intake to nothing four hours before he goes to bed... have him use the toilet before bed, and if you feel you have to, get him up again before you go to bed.

Talk to the doctor?

OK. Just do what you have to do. If that means stuffing him in a closet with a Tetra pack, go ahead

I have a son similar to this, I hope you get the help he needs. Have you considered meds?