I do not want to waste money that I don't have unless I am absolutely positive the doctors will agree that I have ADHD.
Stop listening to people鈥檚 conversations after only a few sentences. Get distracted very easily (ex. Teacher was lecturing and all I could pay attention to was the tiny bug crawling on the floor.) I can never remember things. If I think something is going to be long, instead of paying attention to that something I just think about when it will end. I have no motivation whatsoever. I get bored with things very easily, ex. Friends, music. I have trouble talking to people because I never know what to say and dread having to listen to long one on one talks. I hardly have any friends because I am too paranoid that someone won鈥檛 like me so I don鈥檛 communicate well when people do talk to me. I have trouble hearing what people are saying and often ask 鈥淲hat?鈥?despite the fact that a few years ago (when this was still happening) having my hearing checked by a specialist only to be told I have perfect hearing. I scramble getting my words out. I can鈥檛 put my thoughts into words. I鈥檓 always interrupting other鈥檚 when they talk and my sister points it out to me later on but despite her informing me of what I鈥檓 doing, I still do it. I鈥檓 afraid to do anything because I don鈥檛 want to embarrass myself. I change my mind over and over again, sometimes within minutes or even seconds. While I don鈥檛 get a loud anger, the tiniest things can make me angry. For example, when someone spills something I鈥檒l get super angry about it even though it is something miniscule. I often do poorly on tests in school because I blank and just think about how everyone else is going to finish before me. Fill in the blank questions are an almost guarantee fail. I have difficulty learning new things, especially when they do not interest me. Even when it is something that interests me, I forget after even 10 minutes. I can not in any way multi-task. I forget even the most important things, like crucial financial due dates. I even forget my book bag for school when that is the only place that I am going to. My sister often tells me that I seem spaced out. I鈥檓 often confused about everything. I always need direction and even when those directions are given I can鈥檛 understand them. I always plan on changing things but then after a few hours I tell myself not to even bother because I can鈥檛 do it. I am messy and often times dread putting detail into anything. If I hear any sort of noise that doesn鈥檛 have to do with what I am trying to direct my attention to I can鈥檛 stop focusing on the unwanted noise. Even when I get up at 7A.M. for school I cannot fall asleep till at least 5:00A.M. The following day. Often times I roll around in bed because my thoughts are running and running and my heart is always pounding right before sleep. I often times do not complete things that I start and move onto other things. Even when I have nothing to do all day and have work that needs to be done, I don鈥檛 do it. I literally just sit there thinking about how bored I am for hours. I have had one job that lasted four months and had many weeks inbetween then where I was not working, usually being 3-4 hour shifts, never more than 6 hour shifts. This is not because I am lazy, it is because I am scared of being bored, communicating with people, and having to do one thing for a long period of time. I worked in retail for that short time and any time a customer would ask me for assistance or questioned me about a product I panicked, blanked, fumbled on my words, etc. When customer would ask me if something was in stock, I would have difficulty finding it, then when I would go to find the customer to tell them if it was in stock, I would forget what they look like. When I am invited to hang out at a friend鈥檚 house or a party I often place myself away from where everyone else is or get nervous. I have been described by many as 鈥淪ocially awkward.鈥?On rare occasions can I actually communicate well with people I do not know. On days where I know I have to public speak I feel shaky, nervous, and dreadful. I often am frustrated and angry which leads me to feeling depressed. I never feel just depressed, it is always caused by my frustration and anger which leads me to believe that me having depression is out of the question. I have no self esteem whatsoever. I have always been 100% doubtful about doctor鈥檚 diagnosing patients and always felt there was no hope for how I am. Now that I realize that I need to focus if I want to succeed in life I want to know if there is any treatment. I鈥檝e described to few people how I feel and many of them believe that it sounds similar to that of ADHD. I have always felt this way ever since childhood but I never spoke out to anyone about it due to my family鈥檚 financial pressures I didn鈥檛 want to make them spend their money on something that I didn鈥檛 believe in. But feedback on others who have taken medication for ADHD say that it works w Your question got cut off.
Either way, I think the people who read that question didn't need much more information to be sure of their answer.
I'm going to be very short and to-the-point with this.
Yes, I think you have ADHD or a similar disorder. I have no medical profession but my cousin who I am close to has ADHD and you sound a lot like him. Though the main symptoms to his ADHD is his anger/outbursts of violence, there is no denying that what you have explained is very likely the symptoms of ADHD.
There is no way you yourself can know 100% of you do have it, but from what you've described, seeking professional help is not a waste of time or money at all like you thought, it's probably crucial.
Start by visiting a GP and move on from there. With help you can feel so much better and have a better quality of life. I wish you the best. Good luck. |
